How to Train Your Dragon: How to Seize a Dragon's Jewel Read online

  were challenged by this, because he was having to

  defend himself from Valhallarama while trying to

  manoeuvre her into a position out of the way of that

  tree when it fell down on top of her.

  Oh for Thor’s sake, this was impossible! That

  six-foot-three female metal mountain would just not

  budge.

  He parried her lunges with a Grimbeard’s

  Grapple, Flashburn Fancy and two Points of Order

  before realising she was never going to move, and

  for such a very small dragon the Wodensfang was

  making good progress with that tree trunk – it was

  already beginning to wobble, and visible flames were

  lighting up the grass at the bottom.

  Desperately, Hiccup defended himself from the

  Nevermiss’s most brilliant fencing-work with his left

  hand, while trying to yank off that horrible jammed-

  tight tin-can of a helmet with the other.

  ‘TIM-BERRRRRR!’ sang the Wodensfang and

  Toothless in joyful chorus together. The burnt-through

  tree was swaying madly.

  Hiccup gave one last beyond-hope pull and the

  helmet finally shot off his head with a violence that

  made his ears tingle.

  He shouted at the top of his voice, ‘Mother!

  57

  Don’t attack! It’s only me, your son, Hiccup! And get

  out of the way of that tree, which is about to fall on

  your head!’

  But most unfortunately, totally unconsciously, he

  shouted those words in the tongue he had been used to

  speaking in for the last six months (he hadn’t had any

  human companions you see). Not in Norse, but in

  Dragonese: ‘Mi mamma! Na bitey! Issa lonely

  me, ta dissappointa Hiccup! Plus outadaway

  da leafdangle which yappen lowdown ta

  brain-boxer!’

  So much for letting her know

  gently in a quiet moment.

  Life is sometimes

  much more messy

  than that.

  Valhallarama’s blue eyes practically fell out of her

  visor, popping with amazement. She went absolutely

  rigid with shock, in the slightly ridiculous and

  undignified pose of Mid-Looping-Loot-Bubbles, one

  of Flashburn’s more showy-off moves which should

  really only be attempted by someone about ten years

  younger and half the girth of Valhallarama, formidable

  action-woman though she was.

  No wonder she was surprised.

  For in one gob-smacked, sword-arm freezing

  second, she had learnt:

  1. That she had just been attempting to kill her only

  son by accident.

  2. That said son was in fact the Outcast and Enemy

  of the Wilderwest, whom everybody (not just the

  witch) said was the one who set free the Dragon

  Furious and started this war between dragons and

  humans.

  3. That the same son appeared to have

  the Slavemark on his forehead.

  4. That the same son appeared to be

  fluent in Dragonese, a language that

  had been banned. Not that anyone

  but Hiccup could speak it anyway.

  59

  This was a very great

  deal to take in, in just one

  moonlit moment.

  The one piece of

  information that she wasn’t able

  to take in, because it was spoken in

  Dragonese, was the one that would have been most

  immediately useful to her.

  The information that a tree was about to fall on

  her head.

  CRAAASSSHHHHH!

  The tree snapped off at the trunk and…

  BOOOOOIIING!!!!

  … It landed plum on Valhallarama’s metal head.

  And then bounced off it on to the ground.

  Valhallarama stood absolutely stock still for one

  second.

  She re-arranged herself into a more dignified

  position.

  And then she swayed gently on the spot…

  And…

  CRAAAASSHHHHH!!!

  She went down like the tree trunk itself.

  ‘NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!’

  Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear!

  Hiccup hopped anxiously from foot to foot.

  ‘B-B-BINGO!’ shouted Toothless. ‘GOOD

  SH-SH-SHOT WODENSFANG!’

  And then he flapped down and shouted insults

  down her visor.

  ‘YOU B-B-BIG HUMAN BULLY!’

  Hiccup tried to wave him out the way, and

  Toothless thought he was reminding him about

  manners.

  ‘SORRY, YOU GREAT METAL

  M-M-MOLLUSC! PARDON ME, YOU

  LUMPING L-L-LARDBOTTOM LEADBELLY!

  EXCUSE US, YOU TERRIFYING TIN

  OF T-T-TESTOSTERONE!’

  ‘Manners,’ said

  Toothless smugly to Wodensfang.

  ‘Yes, well done, Toothless,’ congratulated the

  Wodensfang brightly. ‘Lovely apologising.’

  Hiccup pushed Toothless off and snapped open

  his mother’s visor.

  Oh thank Thor, she’s breathing…

  She was breathing but she was out for the count,

  and there was a big fat lump on the front of her

  forehead. Unfortunately the Windwalker, seeing that

  the terrifying Warrior was still breathing and whipped

  up into a state of hysterical panic

  by the fighting, tried to get

  Hiccup to ride him out

  of danger.

  And when Hiccup wouldn’t listen, he lost it

  entirely, and picked Hiccup up in his claws, despite

  him desperately struggling and shouting, ‘Nooo!!! It’s

  my mother!!! It’s my mother!!!’

  Wodensfang and Toothless flew on either side of

  his head making soothing noises, thinking that he was

  the one who had taken a funny turn on account of all

  the fighting.

  It took him ten minutes to get through to them

  what had happened even without the helmet to shout

  through.

  After catching their breath, Hiccup insisted that

  they went back to where he thought the fight had

  taken place, but there was no sign of any unconscious

  mother, just a deep indentation in the snow where she

  had fallen beside the still smouldering tree-trunk.

  Where had she gone? Had the Razorwings got

  her? Or had the Silver Phantom returned and carried

  her to safety?

  They searched the forest for the rest of that night,

  but they never found her.

  Eventually in the early hours of the next

  morning, Hiccup pushed aside some brambles and

  crawled into a cave he had been using as a hide-out

  for some sleep. The warm wet shaggy body* of the

  Windwalker beside him, and his two friends Toothless

  and Wodensfang snuggled on his chest were always a

  source of comfort.

  He might be an Outcast, but at least he had his

  dragons with him. Not like Fishlegs, who was entirely

  alone.

  Just as he was falling asleep, Hiccup remembered

  something.

  He no longer had the map.

  * The Windwalker is looking a little less shaggy because he has grown a

  little older.

  3. HICCUP MUST DIE

  The Wodensfang had in fact
been right about the

  Dragon Furious sending a dragon to kill Hiccup.

  A few weeks earlier, in the endless night of winter

  on the little isle of Berk, where the air was so cold it

  stung the skin like bees, the Dragon Furious lay in

  the smoking ashy remains of what had once been a

  Hooligan village.

  The Dragon Furious was a Seadragonus

  Giganticus Maximus, and he was in command of the

  Dragon Rebellion. His aim was nothing less than the

  extinction of the entire human race.

  The Hooligans had escaped from the last terrible

  dragon attack, fleeing to the islands of the south which

  were still holding out against the relentless progress of

  the dragon invaders, but leaving the island of Berk to a

  triumphant Dragon Furious.

  The island of Berk was a new and important

  conquest for Furious. And yet…

  And yet there was one Hooligan who had not

  been among the Hooligans who escaped from the

  island on this day. One Hooligan whom the Dragon

  Furious and the entire Dragon Rebellion had been

  hunting without success, over seas and forests and

  mountains, through ice caves and volcanoes…

  Hiccup Horrendous Haddock the Third.

  So many times had the little Hooligan slipped

  through Furious’s talons at the very last minute,

  double-backing, sneaking past, and streaking away on

  the back of his Windwalker, with the whole howling

  pack of dragons after him, like a tricksy little fox fleeing

  the hunt.

  Kneeling in front of the Dragon Furious was

  a rare Triple-header Deadly Shadow dragon. You

  could not see him, for a Deadly Shadow was one of

  those chameleon dragons whose skin can mirror any

  background or passing object, so at that moment he

  appeared to be invisible.

  ‘Hiccup must die,’ said the Dragon Furious to the

  Deadly Shadow. ‘We have to catch him, or our cause

  is lost. Can you do it? Can you find and kill Hiccup

  where all others have failed?’

  Slowly the camouflaged skin of the Deadly

  Shadow turned back to its natural colour, and it was as

  if the terrifying creature was suddenly materializing out

  of thin air. You could see him in all his splendour now:

  gleaming, muscled, panther-like strength, frighteningly

  efficient-looking claws and jaws that could shoot forth

  both lightning bolts and flame.

  67

  The three heads of the Shadow smiled. The

  poison-ducts in his six cheeks pulsed yellow for

  a second. Out of their secret hiding-places crept a

  bright, slitting talon or two that shone for a second

  and then slid back.

  ‘My lord Furious,’ said the middle head of the

  Deadly Shadow dragon. ‘Once, my brothers and I

  loved a human. And this human died of grief because

  of the actions of her human family. Now we hate the

  human with a hatred strong as acid. If you ask us to

  kill him, the boy is as good as dead already.’

  ‘Ah,’ said the Dragon Furious with satisfaction.

  ‘I knew I was right to choose you, for you are so

  like myself. I needed one who hates like I do, and

  who will not weaken, for the Hiccup boy, with his

  antics releasing all the dragon-traps, has even been

  gaining sympathy among the weaker members of my

  Rebellion. Follow him, and kill him. Hiccup must

  die!’

  ‘And Hiccup shall die!’ hissed the three heads of

  the Deadly Shadow.

  He folded back his wings like a bat, and leapt

  into the air, turning white as the blizzard as soon as he

  hit the sky. The Dragon Furious watched him go, the

  quiet snow falling.

  68

  ~ STATISTICS ~

  FEAR FACTOR: ..................... 10

  ATTACK: .............................. 10

  SPEED: ................................ 10

  SIZE: .................................... 10

  DISOBEDIENCE:.................... 10

  The largest of the dragon species;

  Seadragonus Giganticus Maximus

  live in the open ocean.

  Learning to Speak Dragonese

  Moo-lady, yow snoddly sniffer is giganticus plus

  warticus, plus, warra eye-pleezee, fur-sprouty hug-

  dangles!

  Madam, you have a very large and

  lovely spotty nose, and what

  beautiful hairy arms!

  Toothless issa griefspotty me

  misschance f-f-flicka-flame ta

  gob-sprout. Twassa bigtime

  hiccup.

  I am so sorry that I

  accidentally set fire to

  your beard, it was a total

  mistake.

  Toothless mak ta me m-m-most speshally

  griefspotties. Toothless’s runners pop in a

  cack-cack di Goredragon, plus me pressit

  muchwide ondi floorsheet.

  I make you my most heartfelt apologies. I seem to have

  stepped in Goredragon poo and trodden it all over your

  carpet.

  T-t-toothless goggla ta struggla wi munch-munch

  di saltsicks lonelywise. Teggly me adda.

  I can see you are having trouble

  eating all those oysters on your own.

  Let me help you.

  Ne-ah, Toothless na s-s-sporta da sprouty-warm. Ta maka

  me inta un girly-goo, plus me preffa ma flame-shootys

  coldover and me flip-flaps lendinta forkfreezies.

  Thankee par ta warmwishes.

  No, I will NOT wear that furry coat. It makes me look like

  a sissy and I would rather my fire-holes froze up and my

  wings turned into ice-lollies. Thank you for your concern.

  4. ONE OF HICCUP’S LESS

  BRILLIANT PLANS

  A few weeks after losing the map, Hiccup Horrendous

  Haddock the Third was lying crouched in the reeds

  on the edges of a tiny little island right in the middle

  of the bay that stood in front of Prison Darkheart –

  the bay called The Dragons’ Graveyard.

  With him were the Windwalker, the

  Wodensfang and Toothless.

  They were crouching down beside

  Hiccup, wings shivering, cats’ eyes peering

  fearfully over the ferns at the horror of the

  landscape all around them.

  ‘You are n-n-not going in there…’

  squeaked Toothless, pointing a horrified

  wing at Prison Darkheart.

  ‘P-p-please tell Toothless you are not going in

  there...’

  ‘I don’t see that we have any choice,’ said

  Hiccup bitterly, ‘now that my mother has betrayed us.

  I must say, I know she’s always been a bit absent, but

  I never thought she’d actually fight against me.’

  Hiccup swallowed. The whole world was burnt

  to ashes, and here he was, feeling like crying over a

  wayward mother.

  But there was no other explanation. Valhallarama

  must have got her Phantom to carry Grimbeard the

  Ghastly’s map to the witch because the witch was now

  in Darkheart, hunting for the Dragon Jewel. And so too

  were the Meathead, Murderous, Visithug and Hooligan

  Tribes.

  Hiccup had seen all th
e ships sail in over the past

  two weeks.

  Which meant that Hiccup’s friend Fishlegs was

  in there, and Hiccup’s father, Stoick the Vast. And

  Hiccup was determined to get them out, now he knew

  where they were.

  It’s my fault they’re in there, so I’m going to get them

  out…

  ‘Oh shiver my t-t-talons!’ wept poor Toothless,

  so terrified he fell off Hiccup’s shoulder and into

  73

  the sea Hiccup was crouching in. ‘Look!’ He

  pointed a wing at all the dragon corpses

  lying in the sea around them. ‘The

  Dragon F-f-furious has been trying

  to get in every night! How are

  you going to get in if even

  he hasn’t managed it!’

  At one end of the bay was the gigantic

  prison that formed the only entrance to the great

  walled hunting-grounds of the Amber Slavelands.

  The walls that encircled the Amber Slavelands were

  not, perhaps, as long as the Great Wall of China,

  but they were certainly much higher, and a similarly

  miraculous construction of the Ancient World.

  In front of the prison, the tide was slowly sinking

  and gradually revealing the grotesque and pathetic

  shapes of thousands of dead dragons. Ancient dragon

  skeletons jutted from the waters of the bay like airy

  melancholy cathedrals, with seagulls shrieking through

  the long-dead ribcages.

  And there were fresh dragon corpses

  too, smelling to high heaven, and leaking green

  blood into the water, because every night now,

  the prison was attacked by some of the most

  ferocious forces of the Dragon Rebellion.

  75

  ‘This is a terrible plan! The witch and Alvin

  will catch you!’ squeaked Toothless, in an agony of

  fear.

  ‘Nobody’s going to catch us,’ said Hiccup

  soothingly. ‘We’ll just sneak in, see if we can find

  my father and Fishlegs and the Jewel, and sneak

  out again. Us Outcasts are good at sneaking. And if

  anybody spots us, I’ve got the Slavemark, so they’ll

  just think I’m another slave.